A (hugging me): Mom? Your heart sounds like a rock band.
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5-year-old niece, pensively: Auntie Melania, you have blonde skin.
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A: I know what the birthplace of jazz is.
Me: Oh, yeah? Where?
A: Wales.
Me: What? Wales?
A: Yes. I think so.
Me: I don't think it is. I think Wales is known to be a very musical place, but I think a number of American cities would consider themselves the birthplace of jazz, and Wales is in Europe.
A: Okay, but I know who invented jazz.
Me: Who?
A: Loo-Iss Armstrong.
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A: Do you know what monster humans are most afraid of?
Me: No.
A: I'll give you a hint. It's like a big snake.
Me: A dragon?
A: No.
Me: A sea serpent?
A: No.
Me: Is this a real monster or a made up one?
A: A made up one. They're scared of it in Japan.
Me: I don't know.
A: Godzilla!!
Me: Ohhh - Godzilla is nothing like a snake.
A: It's a bit like a snake.
Me: It's more like a lizard than a snake.
A: Why do you think it's called Godzilla?
Me: Oh, I don't know.
A: Well, I know the first part. I mean, "God" ...
Me: Oh, but you know, the sounds that make up the name in Japanese could just happen to mean something in English, that they don't really mean. Like, "peru" means "turkey" in Portuguese, not the country at all, and "dude" means "worm" in Arabic.
A: Really?
Me: Yep. Made for some awkward moments in Tunisia.
A: Wouldn't it be funny if "god" meant "ice cream" in Japanese? Then you could say "we're eating gods for dessert! We feast upon the gods!" and if the gods got mad, you could just say, "no, we meant ice cream."
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A (examining his Pirate Pack on the ferry): I bet even I could take this ship. Not one of these sailors is carrying a sword! And is anyone guarding the treasure?! No!
