On the trip to China and Japan:
[We land in heavy smog in Beijing]
A: Actually, this looks just like Manitoba.
Me: That's because you can't see any of it.
___________________________________________
J (on drinking vanilla soda): This tastes identical to Inca Kola!
___________________________________________
J (upon discovering Coke flavoured Mentos): I have Coke, and I have Coke Mentos. I want to do a science experiment in my mouth!
___________________________________________
Dad: You guys don't know who Confucius was?
J: No.
Dad: Well, he was a teacher, and he's pretty famous, someone whose teachings are so well known and respected that he's kind of worshiped. A bit like Mohammad, or Jesus, or ...
J: He's like someone in my class?
____________________________________________
A (holding incense for the Tibetan Lama Temple): Hey J! This makes a great machine gun! Chk-chk-chk-chk-chk! We're the Incense Troopers!
____________________________________________
J (upon seeing electric lamps in the Lama Temple): So, they do use electricity? They work it into their culture?
____________________________________________
A (at the central Beijing train station): Anybody tries to pick MY pocket, they'll find a LOT of junk.
____________________________________________
[I start paying attention to the kids' dialogue in time to hear this]
A: ... and he tried to look innocent, but it's hard to look innocent when you're English.
J: What?
A: You know, English. From England.
____________________________________________
A: I'm starving!! ... Not really. I was being DRO-matic.
____________________________________________
J (on arriving at our hosts' in Hebei): They're treating us a bit like kings.
____________________________________________
A: I will always remember my first taste of fresh goat's milk! Mostly because I took a picture of it with my iPod Touch.
____________________________________________
A (after visiting his first Japanese restroom): They have bum squirters!
____________________________________________
J: What does "obedient" mean? ... Why are you laughing?!?!
____________________________________________
A: Japan and China are really very different, aren't they? But in Canada, people treat them like they're practically the same!
____________________________________________
J (peeling himself off a wall after seeing his first bullet train): That scared the heck - the H-E-double hockey sticks - out of me!
____________________________________________
A: J could strip the bones of half a mermaid in seconds flat.
Me: What?
A: Well, there are some fish that can strip the bones of a person in seconds flat. And J loves to eat fish. And I think you know that mermaids are half fish.
_____________________________________________
A: Ninjas could kill any animal. By befriending it and then when they share a meal, poisoning its food.
_____________________________________________
Me (as we arrive in Vancouver): Wow, look at that blue sky! Where's the smog?
J (rolling eyes): Mom! It's not Beijing!
This is the only thing I occasionally read on on my bi-yearly trips to Facebook. Awesome. As a teacher, I particularly loved: "What does 'obedient' mean?...Why are you laughing!?!?"
ReplyDeleteBum squirters was a very close second.
By the way this is Alex from MTA just in case my comment from my "Google Account" doesn't recognize that.
Awww, thanks! That means a lot to hear.
ReplyDelete